A reminder that someone cares

Thirteen years ago on August eighteenth , Mike and my third child, Caitlyn Lee was stillborn.This had to be the worst thing that has ever happened in our lives. Through time though we have gotten past things. Notice I didn't say over... but past. Though many have forgotten the date of( If not the event itself ) this is a date that will for ever be burned into Mike and my minds. The fact that Robby was born a year and three days later makes things stand out even more. Without going into specifics I will say that at the time there was some miscommunication that led to hurtful things being done or not done as the case may have been. Thankfully this is all in the past and is chalked up to miscommunication and through the years hard feelings have been let go of.The reason that I am bringing this up is that on the eighteenth, as has been the case for twelve years now, I received a card from a dear nurse telling me that she remembered and was thinking of us. How sweet is that ? The even sweeter part is that she was not the nurse who was with me that excruciating day but one who I had met months later through the nurse who was with me. Doing this (for these particular nurses) is a general practice, I guess. In all of the bad that we hear of people in general now a days it is really something to experience this kind of love from someone who could just as well forget about me . So please let me take a moment to thank Nurse Jo Ann for this thoughtful gesture. It made my day. You truly are an angel !

Cindy updates

Yesterday morning Cindy went to the oral surgeon's office to get her stitches out. She had been still complaining of quite a bit of pain and was out of pain medication so I was obviously concerned about her going back to work in the afternoon.It turned out that the surgeon was not there and a technician took the stitches out. Cindy was told that all looked pretty good considering her complications and to take OTC pain killers and go to work as planned and to call the doctor's emergency line if she needed to. This didn't set too well with me but it all worked out fine. It turns out that the vicoden didn't help her anymore than Ibuprofen anyway.No wonder she complained. Anyway she seems to be doing OK in that aspect. In another aspect her financial aid is looking great. The lady called last night to ask her ( since Cindy was at work she asked me )if we were sure we could handle the portion of Nursing school that they would not be able to cover. I guess that they have in the past put out their portion and the recipient was unable to come up with their share so the agencies money was forfeited. For some reason this did not make them happy so I had to give my word that we would handle a small portion. Gee a few months ago we thought a full loan was our only option, we will gladly take care of twenty percent.And hey there is almost two weeks until classes start. Nothing like taking it to the wire.

A few prayer requests

First of all for My uncle Glen who was given six months to live back in December. Glen was admitted to the hospital at the end of last month then was taken to a nursing home. after maybe a week in the nursing home he was back in the hospital with multi system failure. He was stabilized and given six weeks to live but his bodies ammonia level keeps creeping up and the meds to neutralize it have stopped keeping it at bay so this morning the doctors,his wife, and grown children decided to stop medication and take him home to die. Please pray for him and his family in their final hours together.
Also, I will not go into specifics but Uncle Glen also has a daughter who he has not spoken to in years there have been some hurtful things said and done on both ends and from what I hear she is trying through her brothers to make peace before he dies.This could also use a prayer.

Secondly I ask for prayers for My Dad's family.After the family reunion My aunt Shirley was having some complications of a bleeding ulcer. She was Grandma's care taker and didn't take care of herself as she needed and by the time she went to the doctors things were getting pretty bad. Shirley went to the hospital for a short stay and was released only for the ulcer to erupt. This caused another four day stay in the hospital critical unit for blood transfusions and treatment. While Shirley was in the hospital Grandma went to Georgia with another of Dad's sisters. This is when everyone found out that one person can not take care of Grandma,a alone. Shirley got home from the hospital last weekend and Grandma is now back in Ohio but on Saturday the family will be moving her into a nursing facility. This is hard on everyone involved as Grandma's dementia has her oblivious to the plan. Please pray for everyone involved but especially that Grandma somehow adjusts to her new surroundings. A couple years ago when she broke her hip and was in a nursing facility for rehab she got confused , refused to eat, and had to go home early. Going back home is not an option this time. Please pray that everything works out.

Cindy Update

Today marks the forth day since Cindy's oral surgery. She is doing pretty well even eating some regular foods now. Her pain still needs to be controlled by a combo of vicoden and Motrin 800, so she can't drive yet but she is sleeping less and can talk pretty well now that most of the numbness has worn off. I expect that she will not be totally back to herself for a while yet but that is to be expected considering that this is a painful procedure to begin with and then add her complications to the mix, throwing in all of the fun financial aid stress that she is under , she is doing rather well ,in my opinion. She hopes to be back to work on Tuesday but I have my doubts so we will just have to see what the surgeon says Tuesday morning. Please continue to pray.

Judging

Years ago when I was a Girl Scout Co-leader, the other leader and I would have each girl take a turn at bringing a snack to our meetings. Since we had a group of girls who came from homes where both parents worked, home made treats usually gave way to store bought cookies, pudding cups, fruit roll ups, etc. The funny part was that most people seemed to put the snacks in bags which contained their receipts from grocery store visits if they didn't stop on the way to pick up snack and of course always left the receipt in the bag. Being the person I am I always laid the receipt up and made sure that I asked that weeks owner if they needed it before throwing it away.We had a couple girls who got bored waiting for snack to be served and were known to grab these receipts and read off what all had been bought. The other leader and I of course discouraged this practice but it still happened more than we liked.
One day after admonishing a girl for doing this a parent who was in attendance admitted that she found it interesting what people would buy and that it said something about them. yes, she was right but how true was this? How about the lady who always cooks nightly dinner from scratch but picked up boxed potatoes to donate to the food bank ? How about the Mom who gets up early every morning to cook her children breakfast who buys a box of cereal for her preschoolers to make fruit loop necklaces as an organized preschool craft. I didn't like how people could be judged by a one time shopping trip.
This being said, after Cindy's appointment Tuesday I found myself in Save A lot buying jello & pudding cups, cotton candy flavored yogurt, cottage cheese, three different kinds of Popsicles,canned tomato soup, chocolate milk, & 7 up. These were all soft foods which were recommended for Cindy.With the exception of the chocolate milk and cottage cheese, these are also things that I never buy but what would someone from the outside think ? Here I am an overweight Mom buying $35 worth of junk. Surely many would shake their heads in shame ! I guess it just goes to show, you can't judge a person, or a family on what appears to be. I think in one way or another this is something that most of us need to work on. Oh and by work on I don't mean to make sure that you shred your junk food receipts before anyone sees them in an attempt to claim that you never buy the junk that the Jones' do !Just thought I'd clarify that

Ever wonder why our society is what it is ?

Because of Cindy's oral surgery yesterday, she is on pain killers which prevent her from driving. For this reason, I had to accompany her to her third day of financial aids workshop this morning. First of all we were early so when we went in and Cindy gave the lady her pay check stubs, Mike's pay check stubs, and the many other pieces of information that were required.This lady copied them and passed the copies to another lady who came to tell us that Mike's income was too high for assistance. I smiled as I explained, yet again, that we had been sent to this particular agency because my husband's wages were cut and this company had grant money for the workers of this company and their families. OK the woman said, I will have to pass these on to another then. Fifteen minutes later another woman came out of an office. She would be doing our interview, we were told but she would not be available for a half an hour or so. OK we smiled and thanked her. Sure enough about forty minutes later the woman came back and handed me the copies of Mike's pay stubs. Cindy has made enough in the past six months to be considered a non dependent, we were told. OK, again I smiled.Finally we were asked into an office where Cindy signed papers and was asked 1) if she was pregnant....No ! 2)Does she have any children ?...... NO! 3)Has she ever been arrested.... No! 4) Has she ever been in rehab ?....... No !5) has she ever run away from home?.... No !6),7),8),9), 10).......No,no,no, no, no!
Hmmmm the lady looked at us, you wouldn't qualify as a minor ( anyone under 21 in their eyes ) with no barriers, she informed us ! Cindy looked at her then me then her then me and finally replied, which do you want me to do ? Now wait a minute, I couldn't keep quiet anymore, are you saying that because my daughter leads a good Catholic life and is in no trouble, she is discriminated against ? Well, the lady said..... This is ridiculous, I replied.Let me see if a girl sleeps with everyone she knows in High school and gets pregnant, she now gets an apartment, free medical coverage, food stamps, a welfare check,and now she gets free schooling where a girl who leads a good life,saves herself for marriage, works hard, doesn't do drugs, and is obedient to her parents gets nothing? No wonder these girls are actually happy to be teen mothers. Society is doing these kids a huge disservice !
I guess my little episode made the lady think as she said that she would send Cindy to another lady who could possibly change her status to adult and maybe get something through that way. I guess that word of my questioning behavior got around as I was asked to remain in the waiting room as Cindy was called back this time. After another half an hour of listening to kids Cindy's age talk about their children ,baby daddy's and mommas, and even their probation officers, Cindy emerged from the office. Well, I asked. They found a barrier I was told... OK, I was scared to ask. Here this woman asked Cindy first if she was abused ( after all her jaws are so swollen due to complications of oral surgery) Cindy said no.. Then the lady asked a magical question.... Did your Mom and Dad graduate from college? No Cindy replied... Trade schools ? .... No. They had a barrier, Mike and I were uneducated which puts our kids at risk . ( OK now Mike alone makes enough, even after a cut in pay, to make our family ineligible but because we neither have a degree our kids are disadvantaged? Makes sense to me)Anyway as I shook my head I went with it after all it will get us closer to our goal without Cindy having to get pregnant, do drugs or rob a Quick stop so in the end I guess it is a good thing ! Because of all of this confusion today Cindy has to go back tomorrow to take a test to prove that she is smart enough to pass nursing school once the government gives her money to go. I understand that these are just the hoops through which one must jump for college financial aid but does it make sence that the good kid has a better chance of getting through college than the drug addicted felon, with children's service and their parole officer on their backs? I would think so but hey I am finding out that I am raising my kids all wrong !
I swear , if she is turned down after all of this, I will appeal on the grounds of being discriminated against for leading a good Catholic life. I am sure I will have no problem getting people to stand up for me !
Do we as a society need to give some thought about a few things? I think just maybe... but after all I am uneducated so what do I know ???

Christmas state of mind

Today as I was waiting for Cindy's medicine to be filled I started looking around a local department store. Though back to school is the main theme around here Christmas is starting to trickle in .Now don't get me wrong, Mike and I have been discussing , for awhile now, what we are going to get who for Christmas and I have even started getting some of the extended families gifts. Still, I couldn't help but feel behind. Just as I only had a few minutes left before my prescriptions could be picked up, something came over me as I seen the gift that we had planned on buying the boys this year and this store was one of the few who still had a lay a way, so I couldn't help myself, I found myself filling out a lay a way slip. This is really a good thing as the big debate this year was whether to buy multiple little gifts which amounted to a certain total ( like we have done all of our children's lives) or , since they have so much and we are both sick of gifts from last year which the kids asked for but are still in the unopened boxes. My actions have made the decisions for me. I am sure that they kids may have a moment of wonder when they only see one package , with their name under the tree but hopefully when they open it, that look will change.